Crazy is as crazy does.....

I hesitate to make a post like this, but I really need to vent a little. It's therapeutic for me to get the words out of my head and see them. We've had a big change in our family. My step-son has moved in with his mother. My husband's crazy ex has been at it again. I'll never understand people who need constant chaos in their lives. I don't have the time of energy to go over the past 12 years of drama, but it's been SUPER fun. Let me tell ya. My husband and I have absolutely, 100%, never talked negatively about his ex in front of their two kids. It’s sad that she has never given us the same respect in return. She talks badly about us constantly, and she has nearly ruined any chance of me having a good relationship with my step-kids. If the kids attempt to defend us to her in any way, she will start in with the manipulation. "Oh, you love them more than me?!" They never hear the end of it. They were too young to remember, but SHE is the one who left them back in 2004. She was running around, chasing guys. She was rarely seeing her kids. My husband was working full time and taking care of two small kids the best he could. When she heard that I was in the picture, she has done nothing but stir up drama. I am ALWAYS the scapegoat. I walk on eggshells. I choose my words carefully, because I know she grills them about everything that I say or do when they are here. It doesn't matter if my husband and I do everything right. She is a master manipulator. She can spin any situation and make herself look like the "victim". Isn’t it nice that she doesn’t have to deal with that same level of BS when it comes to her husband? I guess my husband is just more mature than that. He doesn’t feel the need to cause chaos constantly like her. It’s really sad that a 17-year-old girl has to be told that it’s ok to love BOTH sides of her family. She was literally crying and said, “Really? I can?”

Her crazy mother has made the kids choose between their parents, and it’s really pathetic. She involves the kids in everything. She tells them details of conversations that aren’t their concern to try and make my husband look bad. She will tell the kids, "O..M..G....your dad is yelling at me." or "Your dad is being so mean to me." ((Insert dramatic "victim" face here.)) There is really no winning with that woman, because we won't stoop to her level. My step-son has wanted nothing to do with his mother for quite some time. He is 14 now, and he is starting to see the crazy for himself. If he didn't want to go see her, she would threaten to take away his phone. She even threatened to cancel his health insurance......um.....do what now? What parent makes that kind of threat? We have insurance on his anyway, so whatevs. When his phone was bugging out, she refused to authorize us to take it in to have it fixed, so I spent literally hours researching the problem. Figured out it was a bad battery and ordered a new one. But apparently, I "hate" him. Someone who hates you isn't going to spend that much time helping you out.

The word "crazy" really doesn't accurately describe this woman. I am pretty sure she has Munchhausen syndrome, mixed with Hypochondria, and then you add in a severe personality disorder. I've never seen anything like it. She LOVES going to the doctor, and she loves dragging the kids there too. She makes my step-daughter stay home from school to "take care of her" when she is sick. That's not a kid's job!! Awhile back, the crazy ex got an infection after oral surgery. She literally told the kids "she could die” like 17 times. Parents should be honest, but they should also protect their children. Do you think my husband let the kids know how he almost died? No. Why worry them like that? He was in the hospital with his blood sugar close to 700. He could have died. The doctors were surprised that he wasn’t having a stoke. When he went to the hospital with what was believed to be a heart attack, did he freak the kids out by telling them he might be having a heart attack? No, because parents should protect their children. She needs constant attention and sympathy, and it's really disturbing.

We get the kids' insurance statements, and my step-daughter was at the doctor more in one month than I have been in 20 years. The same week that my step-daughter had her first period, she had her at the doctor getting her on birth control pills. She wasn't having a issues, had no boyfriend or anything like that.....it was odd.

She took my step-son to the eye doctor when he went to stay with her for a couple weeks over the summer because he is "almost legally blind". That's funny since he has never once mentioned not being able to see clearly.
She said his tennis shoes were a "size and a half too small' so she had to buy him shoes. You aren't going to be able to get your feet in shoes if they are that small for you. Again, he never said anything to us. She took him to the chiropractor and they found something wrong with his back. Of course, bc chiros always do. I have my own personal beef with chiros that Ill save for another day. He has never complained of back pain. Not once. She took him to the dentist for a checkup and he needed one tooth pulled. Its been like 7 months since his last checkup and he hasn't complained at all about tooth pain.....but its our fault. She took him to the orthodontist and had braces put on even though he was VERY adamant that he did not want braces. She threatened to call the cops for "medical neglect".......mkay. Then, she immediately demanded half of the money from us. She doesn't bat an eye dropping hundreds for herself and my step-daughter to get their hair and nails done and getting mani/pedis and massages regularly, but got pissed and expected reimbursement when she spent money on my step-son Funny how that works.

Anyway, I rambled a little. Back to my point. She wanted to spend some time with my step-son before school started. He really didn't want to go, but he knew he would never hear the end of the it. She spent the week "whining and dining" (sorry-can't think of a better expression) him. Spending lots of money. Doting on him. She has been treating him like the king of the world. He just broke up with his girlfriend, so he didn't want to face her at school. She used that to her advantage by telling him he could have a "fresh start" if he moved in with her. Literally, the DAY before school started the crazy ex sent a text to my husband from my step-sons phone basically blaming it all on my husband and calling him a crappy father. I have never seen my husband so hurt. It was pretty messed up.

The sad fact is that my step-son is very much aware that his mom has been bribing him (those were his words), so my best guess is that he is taking advantage of the situation. He is a teenager, so I can’t really blame him too much. If he can do what he wants and get a bunch of stuff, what teen wouldn’t like that? He barely wanted anything to do with his mom for a long time. My husband had to literally force him to visit her. Now, he thinks his life will be so “magical” with her? Right. We've been there, done that. He tried was living his mom a couple years ago. Same scenario. Lots of money, manipulation, doting. He wasn’t happy. The money runs out. The doting stops. He was always the third wheel. He doesn’t want anything to do with manis, pedis, spray tans, hair extensions, massages, etc. He didn’t have anyone to hang out with or talk to. Keeping him happy there is going to be a full-time job.....and expensive. She can only keep up this charade of  buying his love for so long.